The Giraffetasaur looked distraught, lit only by a single candle's flame, as he paced the floor of his dark mansion. No one was sure if that sneaky Giraffetasaur could carry a whole episode by himself, since he wasn’t especially easy to empathize with. (Mostly because he was half giraffe.) But the Giraffetasaur was a very handsome billionaire now, and his recent donation to a few important scientists had helped them find a very important cure.
“What violent hand so tortures me today?” The Giraffetasaur had never soliloquized before, but it felt good. “Not long ago I was accomplice to the meanest man. I snatched up babes and caged in Brad. Yet thought that all was done. Reform! I said, I’ll write the show...
“But all these dollar billions that I wrote into my storyline have left me unfulfilled.” That Giraffetasaur looked around. “So, now I’ve called on Brit’ny—and I have a plan.” He paced into his laboratory, satisfied with eight lines of iambic pentameter, and picked up a syringe.
“When I see Brit’ny, she will take my cure.” The Giraffetasaur smacked his lips villainously and cackled like a fiend. But then he heard a window crash! and a man tumbled into the Giraffetasaur’s dark laboratory.
The Giraffetasaur was so surprised. And everyone else was so glad that the Giraffetasaur wouldn’t have to carry the rest of the episode by himself.
The other man spoke: “I’m here to stop that Mayor’s meanest Plan. That villain’s anti-baby, and I’m certain so are you… Look here, your cure is mine!” The Giraffetasaur couldn’t see anything, so he flipped a switch on his villainous wall.
Suddenly, a light came on and a cage fell from the ceiling. The Giraffetasaur cackled at the trapped Brad. “I don’t obey that meanest mayor anymore—the cure is mine alone.”
Brad laughed. “Your cure? You donated so handsomely, but ne’er could it be yours... You’re not even human.”
The Giraffetasaur’s feelings were hurt, especially because Brad broke the rhythm in his last line. So the Giraffetasaur turned and left his lab with all the cure he needed for his meeting with Brittany.
And so, Brad was all alone. He was curious about all the boxes of that important cure just sitting there in the cage with him. So he picked up a syringe, and dripped one drop onto his tongue. He felt it instantly. And all of a sudden…
Well, that’s a surprise.
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